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Domestically-Challenged

I've got a confession:

Homemaking is unnatural to me!

It is REALLY hard for me to staying at home! I mean, I am really happy to be spending time with my baby at home. Playing with her, holding her, feeding her, doing her therapy exercises... I can do all that. But the truth of the matter is I'm not used to taking care of the home. The kitchen. The bathrooms. The bedrooms. The empty walls!

I am so used to going to school and getting good grades. I was bred to do that. I was taught at young age that getting good grades led to making lots of money and that was the definition of the "good life." There was very little emphasis on taking care of the home. How was I supposed to know about the importance of cooking wholesome, nutritious and thoughtful meals? Cleaning until there's not a spec of dust in the house? Artfully decorating a home and accepting visitors, making them feel welcomed? If someone could grade me on those things, I would definitely get a bad grade! I am just not good at it. I don't like doing it. It makes me uncomfortable. When I fail, it makes me want to try less. And that's the honest truth.

But it's times like this that instead of complaining and getting by with just the bare minimum, I know there is an opportunity to lean on God for His grace. He can change my heart. He can teach me. I will need to rely on Him since it comes so unnatural for me...I can only pray that this much needed change happens sooner than later! Because really, I want to love being at home with the children. I want to love decorating (within a budget) and making my home feel like a sweet haven for my children to run around in, and for my husband to come home to...

I'm just not good at it. But here's to hoping one day I will be! By God's grace!

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