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Mamang, you're the queen of our hearts. Your love is like tears from the stars...

Our Mamang 
Rufina Angara Teh
1928-2018

This past Sunday, my grandma Mamang passed away peacefully in her sleep. She was 89 years-old.

When Mamang's heart stopped beating, time seemed to stop. And it did, for many of us, because how can we continue living our lives when someone who's literally been there through it all suddenly just STOPS being in it?

I think dealing with the present is difficult because we have to come to terms that nothing will ever be the same...Mamang won't be there when I go to my mom's house. Every birthday for as long as I can remember involved somebody singing a birthday song along with Mamang making some funny comment. And when she gave gifts it was always in an envelope along with some money, and sometimes, if you were lucky, it would have an index card with a sweet handwritten message on it, like this:


"July 25/15 Happy Birthday to Evangeline! I hope you are always in good health. Because health is wealth! And Beauty is Capital! Love always, Mamang"  (LOL at the beauty is capital!)


Mamang wasn't your typical grandmother. Sometimes when I talk with friends, they would tell me about how close they were to their grandma, or how they were closer to their grandma than their own mothers. I was like, dang, I don't have that kind of relationship with my grandma! Mamang was super open about her favoritism for the boys in our family (my little brother was her favorite out of all 35+ grandkids!) Also, if Mamang wanted something to be said or done, she would practice her iron will and be unmovable until it happened her way. If you weren't driven out of your mind, you were laughing at how ridiculous the situation would escalate! She could also be very critical of a person's looks (in my case, this was all the time!) She also found a lot of joy in shocking people with her inappropriate humor (especially Kevin!) Well, Kevin thought I was exaggerating a lot of these traits until he saw it for himself. Here are a few examples of some moments where Kevin was like "Did Mamang really just say that?!"

----
Mamang: Oh hello Kevin, what are you studying? Are you going to be a pastor?
Kevin: No, Mamang. I won't be a pastor. I want to teach in a university classroom. I'm studying the Bible because I want to be a professor so I can teach students about Jesus.
(10 minutes later)
Me: Mamang, what did Kevin tell you he is studying for?
Mamang: He told me he is going to be a pastor for a church.
----
Mamang: Oh, Evangeline and Elianna are so beautiful and so SEXY! Such SEXY girls!
Kevin: Mamang, I don't like that word being used for my daughters. Evangeline is a toddler and Elianna is a newborn baby. Let's just use the words "beautiful" and not the word "sexy."
Mamang: Oh...okay.
(10 minutes later)
Mamang: Hello Evangeline! Wow you are very ...SEXY!
(Mamang stares at Kevin expectantly with an innocent look. Kevin raises his eyebrows in surprise and Mamang laughs and walks away)
-----
Mamang: Oh, Evangeline and Elianna are the most beautiful girls!
Kevin: Mamang, what about Leigh Ann?
Mamang: (silence)
Kevin: Leigh Ann is beautiful too. The MOST beautiful is the mother!
Mamang starts laughing hysterically for a good few seconds, then says, "No. I don't agree!"
-----
Mamang: Oh Leigh Ann, you are so very... fat!
Me: Mamang..I'm NINE months pregnant!
-----
Mamang: Oh, is Leigh Ann having a boy or a girl next?
Joan: Mamang, Leigh Ann is having another daughter! Are you happy?
Mamang: (Indifferent, hoping it would be a boy this time, doesn't bother to answer and goes back to watching TV)
-----
Joan: Merry Christmas Mamang!
(Mamang opens the envelope Joan gives her and it has a lot of money in it)
Mamang: Oh thank you Joan. Evangeline, come here. Merry Christmas!
(Mamang then proceeds to hand out the money Joan gave her as gifts to Evangeline, me, Billy, Joshua...) 
Joan: Mamang! What the heck?! That was supposed to be for YOU! 
Mamang laughs and continues to give away the money!
-----
Mamang: Joan, why is your boyfriend Lars so healthy and fit?
Joan: Why don't you ask him yourself, Mamang?
(Lars steps out of the bathroom and comes to sit with them)
Joan: Hey Lars, Mamang has a question for you.
(They stare at Mamang waiting for her to ask)
Mamang: Oh, I was just asking, why are you so sexy?
(Lars is surprised, along with everyone else lol!)
-------
Me: Mamang, how would you describe Tita Bee?
Mamang: Oh, Beehua...she is my lovely daughter. (She starts to tear up, and we are all taken aback by how emotionally sweet her answer was-"lovely" wasn't a word Mamang ever used and the way she said it...it was as if it was laced with countless memories and a heavy appreciation Mamang held in her heart)
Me: That is SO sweet Mamang! How about my mom??? 
(Everyone sits in anticipation for a meaningful answer from Mamang, because everyone knows that my mom is among the favorites of her 8 siblings since she's the youngest)
Mamang: Oh Dides...well....she was... a spoiled BRAT! (She starts laughing hysterically and we are all taken aback by this seamless transition to making fun of my mom!) 
-------

I'm laughing as I type these memories out. Mamang was HILARIOUS! Who says those kinds of things?!

In all seriousness though, one of the things that I'm thankful for these past few years was watching Evangeline grow close to Mamang. As we Face Timed earlier this past week, Mamang's last words to us were "Oh Evangeline-very pretty!" She loved Evangeline so much, and would watch her intently. After Mamang passed away, Evangeline said to me, "Mommy, Mang Mang died? Everyone sad? Aww, so sad...I love Mang Mang." Evangeline knew how much Mamang loved her, and she loved her just as much.









Mamang would always say "Evangeline is so beautiful, my most beautiful Evangeline"


4 generations of Teh women: Mamang-my mom-me-Evangeline-Elianna


We love you and we miss you so much Mamang.
You brought so much joy to everyone who knew you.
Viewing will be on May 11, 5:00- 9:00pm, at Del Angel Funeral Home, 2425 W. Lincoln Ave., Anaheim, California 92801.
Funeral will be on May 12 at Forest Lawn Cemetery, Hollywood Hills.

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